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SubscriptionsSites I Read
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happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy sad happy?
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a trip to the mall today got me thinking,
as i saw everyone so focused on buying overpriced horseshit
so they could improve their facades...
i'm not depressed...
(i think)
but sometimes, i just don't know.
"there are times when i look at people and i see nothing worth liking."
once again, i find myself in one of these stages
where i feel as though i love no one...
and then i realize that i love myself...
and then i hate myself for loving myself...
which, to be quite honest, doesn't really make any sense at all.
and when i do see things worth liking in others...
i don't love them.
i love their characteristics that i find refreshing.
but i don't love them.
i've never loved them.
i don't love.
but perhaps i don't need to see anything in people worth liking,
perhaps all there is to it,
is loving people for the mere fact that
they are people
and they are looking for something not so different from what i seek.
and they are ugly,
and they are selfish,
and they are pitiful.
but i am ugly
selfish
pitiful.
and sometimes i look at myself and i see nothing worth loving.
and i'm just sitting here, covered in my own shit,
and filled with malice toward my fellow man...
but there are still those who embrace me.
i don't know. i'll never know. i'll just go to sleep and forget about all of this in the morning.
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i want to be alone, but never lonely.
when we're lonely, we do the most horrible things.
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i'm counting up the times a day when i can feel alive
at dusk, when i drift off to sleep, and morning, when i rise
my eight remaining fingers shall remain in folded straits
to represent the hours my soul spends in lifeless states.
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there is an ocean of doubt that i intend to cross
but my sails are all torn; my deck, covered in moss
and despite all my fears of what i leave for loss...
i will patiently wait.
i will slowly rebuild.
and soon...
(soon being a loosely ambiguous word, in this case)
i will sail in my vessel when the weather is fair
and set foot on the far coast to meet with you there.
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